no specific topic

yeah. like it. i'm at home currently after spending a nite with my dearest yesterday. u kno, when before i actually gets home there are a lot of things and tonnes of things i planned to discuss but when i'm done bathing and eating watching dvd then i felt like it's better for me to spend some quality time with him like on the bed or sumthing. rather than talking. it's juz that i like the moments when i'm with him alone without any words, juz some touching. feel so relaxing and soothing. and relaxing. love the moments. i can't wait to have more moments like that and insya-Allah lagi berapa bulan je lagi. =)

last week was a damn busy week for me and hubby as well. i have very tight deadlines ie submitting my company's budget for the next 3 years, bad debts calculation & annual fees computation. not mentioning those routine jobs that i have to do. i was like doing it n looking at those numbers for like weeks and at a point i cried coz i can't make it tally. how stressfull i am. finally all that was done n i managed to submit it on time before i went home happily for a long chinese new year holiday. yaay! hooray. n basically most of the jobs with meetings and courses that i have to attend. alhamdulillah.

here we go for my long 4 days holidays. saturday, i went SHOPPING! yeah shopping. hahaha..dh lame tak shopping i bought 2 pants, 2 shirts and shoes. then bro bought 2 shirts. mum takde pape. then penat ajak mum n bro lepak at old town white coffee.. minum and makan roti bakar. so relaxing. got home n managed to watch doraemon. i ws like omigod! i'm 26 years old and yet watching doraemon. haha..but i'm having fun here guys.. just watching some nobita bongok yang suke membuli doraemon. hahaha.. pastu call call hubby tak dapat. suspected his batt is flat. die kata gi main golf. okay sayang..hope u had fun playing golf on turf. ape aku merepek ni. i mean range. hopefully u can play on green sometime in future.

next day lepas lunch zoooommm balik umah nenek. planned nak tido semalam je tapi sebab kak seri gi umah cousin die. so takde orang nak teman nenek. so we stayed another nite. tapi yang tak tahan tu... i banyak tempat kena gigit nyamuk and macam2 serangga. then ckp kat farid, kalo kite balik umah nenek nnt kita bawak balik ubat nyamuk tu la. mosquito repellent. so at least boleh protect org lain from kena gigit. i dh terasa sangap gile. missing hubby sangat. die dh balik on monday. ingat nak spend time with him on monday tapi tak jadi. so we spend time on sunday. sunday i dh cite i buat ape kan. gi makan seafood kat jeram lagi. sedap! izrul belanja.

pastu wednesday start keje balik. this week til tomoro la i guess my week memang pack. dgn month end nye. nasib baik boleh cope la. tadi meeting took like 2 hours. lenguh dh bontot aku ni. kengkadang banyak sgt meeting boleh jadi kurang productivity as said by hubby. i pun kengkadang dah munyak ngan meeting sbb buat i jadi lambat in completing my task. dgn nak masuk bulan baru lagi.

sebagai penutup to this post, well, january is almost over or should i say habis sebab tomoro dah 30th jan 09. alhamdulillah i dh confirm keje. thumbs up! then tinggal brape bulan je lagi to give my concentration on my wedding. hopefully and insya-Allah semuanye berjalan ngan lancar. nak kena plan balik ni. pastu with all the $$. headache di buat nye. ape2 pun semoga dimurahkan rezeki dan dipanjangkan umur. aminnn!!

=(

sakit perut la. the 2nd time period for the year. calculated and strongly thought it is going to be on 30th tapi cepat la 2 days. semalam i gi makan seafood [lagi] jangan jeles eh.. hehehe..yummy! yummy! sedaaapppppnye sehingga antara yang terakhir cuci tangan. hahaha.. tapi pape pun alhamdulillah. haa.. ni nak lunch plak. yang.. nak kapuk. kit yut. please put your warm hands on my tummy. thanx darling dear. anyway, after makan we all gi karaoke. i sang a song duet with hubby. mm..jangan pisahkan by phyne ballers tapi that was not original. yang original sape ntah yg nyanyi. hari ni jalan clear nak datang opis. i smp within 30 minutes. guess so sebab orang ramai tgh cuti hari raya cina lagi. ohh.. sumthing sweet yesterday, hubby sang n dedicate "LOVE STORY" by Andy Williams to me. so touched. terima kasih sayang!for everything and evrything. love u so much.

if u read this hubby--> kalo boleh nak tgk muka u tu mengukir kan senyuman sepanjang masa sebab senyuman you tu penawar kalbu. =) love u!

songs

suddenly i haf a thought bout few days ago.basically it's all on songs.maybe i juz yg wonder kot.y most of d songs created are for those couples b4 married.there r songs 4 those yg dh married but x bnyk.on top of all it is obviously fall 2 d topic LOVE!

missing hubby

yup..that's true. my fiancee is in his hometown currently. he will be back in two days time. how i wish i cud hug n kiss him at the moment. sooo missing hime. love u yang!

kampung season

hubby balik kampung. for 3 days. miss him la. wanted to spend some time with him yesterday nite b4 he went back to kampung. i mean like watching dvd. tapi we ended up spending time on the fon coz it was quite late n bit worry if the dvd session turned out to be more than what we were supposed to do. you know wat i mean. miss him a lot lately. can't wait to be with hime. love him sooooooo much. yang nak kapuk u.

tension..

juz cried coz hubby juz called. hmm.. bout work la. bengang gile i. ingat i ni soooooo stupid. but i stand on my point. by the way, i dh siap tau. tggl balance sheet pastu cam hari ni i balik lambat la. mmm... macam mane i boleh cry. dh tension2 evryone kluar. i call la hubby nak mengadu then tak dpt. i pun gi la beli nasi dulu. pstu skang tgh mkn nasi while dgr lagu 'ternyata cinta' by padi dedicated by hubby to me. thanks. pastu hubby called. tu yang nangis. hhmm.. sbb bile tgh tension or happy kan, then we talk to someone yg we love ie soulmate, our feelings tend to exaggerate more. like wat happened to me earlier. tgh tension pastu ckp ngan hubby then nangis. hmm =(

i got an ofis gossip..hehehe... ---> continuing on this topic. well, sumwhere on wednesday i think, there was supposed to be a meeting between Assist Manager & Above with CEO at my ofis. Suddenly, CEO called both me and kakak senior at my dept (where both of us are just Executive) to join the meeting. Then we were stuck to the meeting til 3pm. til my lunch time was delayed and i was soooo damn hungry. then the next day the kakak senior told me that a few ppl heard in the ladies toilet that someone or should i just say Kak Siti said something in the toilet with dunno who something like this "eh, y plak we both (i n kak senior tu join the meeting) padahal we all ni exec je n kak siti cakap lagi, orang lain yang buat keje we all yang dapat name. hello,, wake up la lady.. how old r u to actually nak dapat attention. doing jobs just to get credit. bile i dgr cam tu..i pun rasa yg osshh!! malasnye nak dgr. as long as i siapkn keje i. well, that's all bout the gossip. bengang kan tapi buat tak tau je. i got a lot of staff to think rather than work.

* love bite *

well.. well.. *love bite* hehehe.. got one that is pretty obvious but today i forgotten that i wore baju kurung to work. today i was damn lapar. think so like so much food i eat. like from breakfast-nasi lemak, lunch-rice with lauk then juz now tea time-rojak. i was quite tensed at work. ni tgh mengupdate quarterly report tu.. i dh ngantuk ni tapi must do my very best. btw, hopefully no more amendments after this. story behind me tensing at work. will be described later but not now. kang ppl see. oh migod.

back to my weekend that i had soooooo much fun with hubby. i'm currently missing him that badly. wanting to be with him all the time. hhmmm.... tapi bile ok balik.. lagi brape bulan je b4 i kawin.. then i will be with him all the time. that's what i like. ohmi god!! I AM GETTING MARRIED! can't believe it. alhamdulillah!!

semalam dh hantar baju kat tailor. songket plus kain yang mama belikan tu. then ade kain ela extra yang hubby belikan dulu. cun... buat baju kurung moden. tinggal satu pasang baju lagi blum nak send. maybe tu taylor dekat shah alam. balik tu jenjalan ikut highway pelik. we all kuar kat area bukit jalil. toll took like 2.50 but the journey become longer like 2 hours. guess so tapi pemandangan cun la. then lepak kat klg lame tgk dvd. pastu balik tru gi jeram. makan seafood. yummy-yummy-sedaaaaapppp gile...so kenyang. banyak gile we order tapi last2 tinggal sotong sket je. udang tu hubby ckp cam salah order sbb we ordered 3 rasa. by right udang kan kalo nak sedap, goreng tepung or sambal kan. at first ingat nak buat goreng butter tapi they don have such menu.. hhmm.. tu yang tetibe buat 3 rasa. apa apa pun.. bravo.. i enjoyed the food and enjoyed myself sooooooo much. thnx hubby. i syok giler.

report..report..

haa..finally siap pun the report. as far as my job is done i've checked the figures and all are the same as per the record we reported to the group. but stil i need double checking from other people to reduce the error. by the way, one of my resolution [get confirmation on job] sudah dapat. alhamdulillah! and yet stil i have to work hard to achieve further in my life plus i punye studies. tapi this sem i cuti maybe insya-Allah next sem i akan ambil. by the way, sekarang sudah lapar... nak makan sket or maybe juz drink a cup of milo. guess so i used too much brain thinking..hahaha...chiow!

football

last saturday without no plans, coz i stayed at home half of the day.. i went to watch football. selangor vs negeri sembilan. 3-0. woohhooooo! it was my first experience so i was a bit nervous and excited. i don't have the photos. it was all taken thru hubby's fren's fiancee's camera. wow! what a long explanation i got there. if she ever uploaded the pics then i will be able to post it here. by the way, i was sooooo happy. buat ombak.. ombak... 1...2...3... hahaha.. then, jerit2 lagi tgk goals that those people contributed.. hahaha..sampai takde suara. tapi i am damn happy. tgk muka hubby pun berseri2. happy sbb i teman die kat sebelah tgk football. maybe i wil follow when the next match kot. let see how. balik tu stop by makan nasi ayam kat this new kopitiam at seksyen 7 [wak dol] not bad la. sedap jgk nasi ayam die. shall try for others as well. balik tu dlm 1.30am. borak2 ngan mum and bob and he was so damn malas nak melayan i. he said.. "cheh..kecoh je pegi tgk bola" "ombak..ombak".. hahaha..walau apapun i sangat gembira itu malam. cleaned up sket2 pastu tido til next day bangun almost 12 noon. NOON okay. guess so i was tired. hahaha... tu pun sebab hubby called. btw, nak pegi wedding his friend. bangun mandi, siap2 then online webcam jap ngan along and her family. swuh mama duduk kat seat depan pc biar die tgk cucu die yang semakin comel tu. miss them tau.. picture of both of them.

hopefully they are doing great there. my sis pun tgk muka happy je. praying that everything's fine there.

okaylah.. i nak tido.. actually ade banyak benda lagi nak citer... tapi dh ngantuk.. nite!

hey..

i'm going home soon. what a loooooonnnggg story i had today. will update when i'm back at home. juz finished eating oreos (3 pcs). love ya!

woke up late. i heard and woke up when the alarm buzzed. then i offed without sensing that i'm going back to sleep. at last i woke up at 7.15am. mum had my baju kurung ironed before i took my bath. was supposed to send bob to skool but tak sempat. so farid sent him there. then siap2 had brakfast, sent farid to college b4 i make my way to office. i know that i'm going to reach the office late. so i already informed mr zek that i'll be late. so came in ard 9.15am. as usual checked in, went to canteen to buy breakfast. actually my mood wasn't that stable since morning. i was like swinging, felt empty. dunno y. trying to make myself feel good. and also trying to call him like few times but he sounded like in a rush, cam nak marah.. i dunno la. maybe it is juz the thoughts that i haf in mind. then i told him bout that roughly after lunch, but he juz said jgn la pk cam tu. nnt u jd saiko. then, i rasa he is not talking or saying something to make my heart at ease. hhmm... i dunno la.. i bengong sangat and blur. at last ard 4 something i managed to get my momentum back. starting doing reports and concentrating to them. hopefully it can be done by next week. lagi satu yg bengong, suddenly my server kat ofis dah full. i can't save my work. ape la bengong. server takleh nak masuk. kelakar. setahu i la.. server mane blh limited storage coz ppl tend to save work. then, how do these ppl want to track back those work that need to be checked. if all the hardcopies are sent to the storage.

my mood are stable okay. i'm at home now. once i got home, i tido like til 9.15pm. my sis called saying that she already bought the tix to the concert. we will be seating la. not standing. she said she'll belanja but maybe i'll chip in like rm100. yeah! thanx a lot. n dont get jealous "i am going to the concert" yeeha .... faiz marican went for karaoke with his frens. hoping that he is having some fun time. tadi tgh hari kan.. i pun ade benda pelik pk pasal die ni. apsal skang die dh takde send me those sweet sweet sms. is it true that bile dh couple lame2.. those sweet sweet things we did for our partner dulu2 dah takde. hhmm.. maybe i should tell him that. tapi i know that die pun mesti ckp u pun same. dh takde sweet sweet words from me. pastu kan mula la i ni pk bukan2.. die dh tak sayng kat i sgt. he is paying more attention to his current gf skang.

talking bout my feelings masa monday yg i citer kat mum tu. i pun lagi rasa pelik. it's like he will be much much more happier kalo kawen ngan orang lain. tapi i ni.. he's marrying me instead of other girls. mmgla i jeles sgt. tapi he is going to be mine soon. fully mine and FULLY MINE... will try to love him til end of my life. and will also let him try to love me til end of his life. i taknak he felt regret marrying me. insya-Allah.. banyakkan berdoa. Aminn..

affirmation

i am getting married with him.

the dream that i am been waiting for since i was like 17 years old.

i am happy and glad.

i really am.

going to have some sleep.

gud nite malaysia!

2nd week of 2009

it was my registration day at uitm yesterday. at first thought of taking half day leave then tgk2 cam tak sempat je plus i ni dh lemau. tak larat nak drive to kl summore, so i decided to take el for the rest of the day. it's damn hot yesterday. siap basah lencun semua kainku termasuk la pantese. haha... then lepak kat ofis faiz rest for a while b4 went down for lunch. the nite before i slept at my sis house. dh banyak kali she asked me to overnite at her house tapi i tak pegi. malas dan malas dan kengkadang tu rasa cam arrgghh.. tak nak leave home. the fact that i'm getting married soon n don think i can sleep at my sis house anymore, it's better if i sleep now. besides i'm going to her house instead of lepaking sumwhere without purpose. watched transformers with cheeq. yan bought the vcd for him. according to yan, they've watched it like few times like nak muntah dah tapi coz he likes it soooo.. tengok la. anak sorang kan. talking bout anak... hmm..=) a more long journey for me to go. sbb insya-Allah nak dapat anak jgk.

semalam after some sitting and relaxing at his ofis, went back home ard 5.30pm. pastu i rasa cam sangat tak syok. biase la, i akan tarik muka masam nak marah tak nak jawab sumer soklan and yg paling best akan jawab "takde pape la" "takde pape" which i think he thought like bullshit. asking me to share with hime what am i facing. i mula2 tak nak la citer. that's y i diam je. then, b4 mum gi semayang i ajak die borak2 with me. i cried like nobody's business. i was like "mak... btul ke ape keputusan yang shima buat ni. nak kawin ngan faiz" mum was like "astaghfirullahalazim.. ma..tak yah la nangis. insya-Allah" banyak berdoa. Tuhan kan ade. pastu i cakap la kat mum i ni jeles pastu i rasa sakit hati bile faiz dok msg2 and call pompuan lain. then i said dulu mmg i ade layan laki lain kejap. then that's y he is revenging. pastu i tanye lagi kat mum, y dgn i kengkadang cam tak layan. i sms pun tak reply. if girl lain tu pantas aje nak reply. if kalo i call tgk name i appear kat fon, cam lambat je nak answer, tapi kalo girl lain if tak call die he will call them. ntahlah mak... then i melantak2 nangis. meleleh air mata. kesat kat baju kurung. mum then advise me, shima.. kahwin tu permulaan untuk satu kehidupan. nabi pun suruh umat die kawin. insya-Allah just banyak doa, jangan tinggal semayang. pasal pompuan lain tu mum ckp lagi... laki ni bini die banyak tapi isteri die satu je. yang tepi2 tu buat tak tau je. tak yah nak amik peduli. juz jaga makan pakai laki nko, jaga diri then doa banyak2. Tuhan kan ade. i rasa soooo damn sebak. mmg rasa nak nangis sangat. can't help it. pastu i ingat balik kenapa he chosed me instead of other girls. i jammed. don have the exact answer. let it be the secret between him and his heart. pastu farid balik, tanye apsal nangis nangis ni. pelik tgk i. pastu mum jawab hal org pompuan la. then time mum tgh cite her experience of marriage, i punye mind pusing2 at that time.. hhmm...are there stil love for him in my heart? i wonder... trying to search inside my heart. within my soul. maybe the place for king of my heart will remain question mark ?? until i really got the answer to it. then insya-Allah it will be filled up with prince and princess. that will be my son and daughter. =) bengong kan i ni. ape2 mengarut la i pk. pastu towards the end, i dh rasa relief lepas mum cite2. i juz doa and istighfar kat God. biar hati i tenang. maybe ni dugaan masa bertunang. at last i tertido lps mandi. roughly ard 10 sumthing. i rasa heavy sgt mata and brain i ni. maybe sbb siang tension campur dgn period plak. so emotion not stable. haiisshhh! bile la nak pandai kawal emosi ni. sometimes it's weird kan bile pk pasal emotion no. sesuai ngan header of my blog. hahaha... enuf bout yesterday.

today i was quite bz at work. balik tu singgah giant jap beli barang nak buat lasagne. dh siap tapi tak brape menjadi sgt. hahahaha.. 1st attempt mahh.. nvm lps ni will try to add more things to spice up my lasagne. today's recipe is juz a basic one. =) he's coming to get one soon. hopefully he'll like the taste of it.

happy new year!!